Feeding your demons – one of my favorite self-help techniques
In 2018 i was finishing an internship in a rehab center in thailand. After 6 months of work, i had to decide to stay for a fulltime job or returning back home to germany. I loved to live in the tropical setting of jungles, beaches and warmth. The work was inspiring and made me blossom. Clients were treated with a holistic mix of cognitive therapy, thai massages, sports, meditation and classic Narcotics Anonymous programs and more. Although we worked long days, i was exited .At the same time my mother back home started developing some strange health issues wich made the family worry, but werent properly diagnosed yet.
Being under pressure
My colleagues in the rehab strongly tried to convince me to stay for a year more, but i couldnt make up my mind. For 2 weeks i tormented myself with this decision. Until one evening, i decided to give this technique a try to rid me of my doubts. Self guiding me through the process with the help of an online article i encountered the demon of my doubts. It was a fiery eyed, 5m tall, dragon like creature. I followed the steps asking him what he wants and really needs. Afterwards dissolving my body into a nurturing nectar to feed him with what he really longs for. Like if you encounter a street dog barking at you and you manage tame him by feeding him.
As the FYD- process has hit, if the demon is fed to its full satisfaction…it usually changes form and becomes a helpful ally. My demon transformed itself…into a big brown toad. Sitting there, calmy, big eyes watching everything, relaxed, awake, ready to jump anytime. I wondered, but could already feel his calming, attentive energy.
The next morning i took my inner toad-ally with me to work. I reacted with calm to my colleagues persuasion attempts. Staying serene, attentive, merely watching. And like the toad-ally….ready to jump out of the situation anytime. Only a week later i got a call from my parents that my mother was diagnosed with a terminal desease like parkinsons. The doctors gave her 3-8 more years to live. Suddenly it was clear i would go back home as soon as possible.
So the practice of FYD saved me another week of doubts and self- torment. Instead i stayed stoicly calm through all arguments with my new ally representation as a guide . I was so impressed with the result for my personal wellbeing that I not only stuck with the method since then, but went through proper training to become a certified FYD-therapist. And if you need help with situations that torment you, i am glad to lead you through that process.